Monday, May 28, 2007

Ain't That the Truth!

I recently read a fabulous column by Carolyn Hax, advice columnist for the Washington Post. I don't know if she has kids or not, but she obviously understands what it means to be a mom who stays at home with kids. She recently answered a question (more like a rant) from a working woman who doesn't understand why her best friend, a stay-at-home mom, doesn't return her phone calls. Carolyn's retort is classic and right on the money.

10 comments:

Christine said...

Beautiful!

Jenny said...

Wow. Right on is RIGHT! I am glad not to have the friends who ask those questions and need those answers. (What Carolyn left out is that the friend works 8 hours a day and is done, while the stay at home mom works 24 hours. no days off unless she has a saintly husband who tries to understand.)
Love it.

anna said...

Amen! I love the "It's needing 45 minutes to do what takes others 15."

I had a good friend come stay this weekend with me. She's been around our family for years but this was the first time for her to see me single parent (with Jesse gone for 2 weeks). She's my age but just newly engaged. After finally getting out of the house at 430pm she said "Geez now I know why moms don't just "run" anywhere!" This was after trying to change a spare tire, finding out we didn't have enough muscle, calling our ins company to send someone out, feeding changing a newborn at least 4 times, refereeing 2 kids, baking a chocolate cake, oh and actually taking a shower.

I promised her next time I'm coming to her place sans kids.

the Thief said...

What, you mean that SAHM's don't just "relax and enjoy" all that "free time" HAHAHAHAHA. I'd like to see the author of the letter try to work her "job" but introduce a toddler (or two or three) to her office. See how productive she is then!

Kat E said...

Geez MB, you have time to blog and read articles in the Post and Vanity Fair...you really can't be *that* busy. I bet you spend the rest of your day on the couch watching soaps and eating bon bons. ;)

Mercedes said...

And, let's not forget that the same principles apply to stay-at-home dads! Although, I can say as the working mother I am, that it is a little exhausting to get home from work -- walk in the door and have the child handed to you immediately while the stay-at-home dad takes a break. What about MY break! :-)

Mary Beth said...

Ritz, you found me out! Just don't tell anyone that sometimes I take a nap in the middle of the day. GASP!

Aunt Lee said...

And, for those of us too afraid to have kids yet, get a puppy and you begin to understand what moms REALLY do! You'll never get the whole experience, but you'll scratch the surface and have more respect for those who choose kids.

Sarah said...

I have a LOT of respect for people who stay at home with their children, and no illusions about how much work and time it takes.

But, as someone without children, I have found it hard when my best friend had children. I have felt jealous that they come before me. I have lost some aspects of a relationship which was very important to me. I have gained other things, especially two beautiful little boys who I love, but I have lost things. I don't think I'm being selfish feeling like this.

Mary Beth said...

Right, Mercedes, except that SAHDs have to factor in an extra thirty minutes for the following, "Yes, I stay at home with my child(ren). Yes, it's my choice. No, I don't feel guilty that my wife is the breadwinner. Yes, I actually enjoy staying at home."

Sarah, I don't think you're being selfish for feeling like that either. I think it's totally fair to grieve and be sad (and jealous in this case) whenever a relationship changes and you get the short end of the stick. You're exactly right!