I Don't Know if I Can Do It

Jay and I went to the orientation for Joshua's playschool tonight. He stayed home with Jay's mom and watched videos and put together puzzles. And when we got home he hugged me tight, gave me big kisses, played with my hair, and assured me that he'd rather go to school than stay home with me. And then I rocked him in his room with his head curled up on my chest while his soft little baby arm held onto my neck and I thought, Why on earth am I going to send this child away from me? Ever?